Let Love Rule: A Q&A With Ihab and Ora Balha

In anticipation of their fall workshop on Sufism and the poet/mystic Rumi, partners Ihab and Ora Balha, a Palestinian Muslim man and an Israeli Jewish woman, talk about their work, their non-profit interfaith kindergarten in Israel, and the importance of exploring spirituality in this fractured world. ("Otherwise, we're lost.”) With grace and gratitude, this inspiring couple reminds us to listen to our hearts as they share their story of falling in love with the practice and traditions of the whirling dervishes: "It's a prayer."

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Can you tell us where you are now? Where you live?

Ihab: Actually, many places. We live in Jaffa. You know Jaffa? 

Ora: Jaffa is one of the oldest cities in the world, on the Mediterranean shore. Tel Aviv grew up from Jaffa. Our children go to school here. We have our own school, the Orchard of Abraham's Children. At the same time, we have been walking on the Sufi path for many years. Our teacher, Jalal al-Din Rumi, who passed about two and a half years ago, was a Sufi, a sheikh from Konya, Turkey, which is the home of Rumi. His father was the head sheikh of Konya and they had a whole generation of teachers. His house was a dergah, like an institute, a sacred place for people to come and study with him. About five times a year, we go to the dergah, this place in Konya. We spend between two weeks to a month over there. When we are there, we open it for people to come. 

Could we share a traditional Esalen check in? Tell us how you are feeling right now.

Ora: Happy. With gratitude and exhaustion all at the same time. 

Ihab: We are very busy. Thank God to hold all this energy with the parents, with the community. And we continue to walk, you know, in the path of love. And in the peace paths and the many people around us every day. It's not easy outside, but we try to make a normal place and safe place for the kids and the parents. Later, we have class with the Sufi students. At eight o'clock, the people will come. And we already, Inshallah, are walking every day with our journey in this life.

Ora: We had a beautiful day. The first graders made the final play. It was the last rehearsal before the real thing with the parents. They did it in front of our oldest children in kindergarten.

With everything surrounding you now, how are you maintaining your work, which is about peace and coexistence?

Ihab: I try…[motions to Ora to finish the thought]

Ora: Look, it's been a very intense year. We both were born and grew up here, so you tend to develop a certain ability to contain very hard things and keep on striving, keep on going. This year was especially tough. Every time something like this happens, and even now after what happened in October, it makes it just more clear how essential engaging spirituality and shifting the mind above all the ideas we have in the world to be able to live in this world. We're so caught up in our thoughts, our prejudices, how we see the other. The only way to live in actual peace is by exploring spirituality and mysticism. Otherwise, we're lost. This whole human race is lost. And I think that this year just enhanced this need. 

And there's so much hatred, and the whole world is taking sides. Our job is to hold a higher space where we remember that we are all human beings. We are all coming from the light, and we have to hold that light. And it's a very big darkness.

It's not easy, but this is what we are here for. This is our service. Everything that we do in the organization — the kindergarten, the school — everything is a manifestation of our spiritual path. Did I make any sense to you, my dear?

Yes, you made me feel very emotional. You made an incredibly universal statement. 

Ihab: Most of the people, I'm sorry to say, at this time, fall down with the politician side, and we have, every day, to try to knock on their hearts to say, "Please don't forget your heart." The most important thing is that you are, we are, human beings, and you have to wake up. If we were stuck with our ideology, our mind — the political side — we all fall down, all of us. And we are keeping and praying together, Ora and me, to make some good energy to continue this path. And Alhamdulillah, thank God, there are many people around us every day.

Can you tell us a bit of your origin story? How did the two of you come to the Sufi path? 

Ora: I met Ihab about 25 years ago. I came from a Jewish family, and he came from a Muslim family. I studied movement therapy and Feldenkrais. I always wanted to explore the spirit through the body, through the movement. One day, I saw the whirling dervishes and realized that was it. It was like a vision, you know. I told Ihab to come with me to this workshop, and he said, "No, you know I'm not a dancer." I said, "It's not dance; it's not about dance. You have to come!” 

Ihab: I came because of her, because I love her. I said, "OK," but in my heart, I said, "I'm Muslim. I know how to pray,” but she wanted to. [I thought] she will teach me., In the beginning, my ego … but it was the best gift. Hamdulillah, thank you. This event was very special. It was like a very deep introduction to the Sufi path of love and really understanding the deeper meaning of love, not only personal love but very deep universal love. And understanding the practice of the whirling dervishes. It's being very present. It's not ecstatic dance … it's a prayer. 

Ora: [To Ihab] And sorry, I'm speaking on your behalf, but Ihab always shares that Sufism is like the essence of Islam, the heart of Islam. He knew a lot about Islam as a Muslim and religious person, but I think that it really shifted his whole understanding.

Ihab: You know, in the beginning, you believe in God. But when you walk in the mysticism, in the Sufi path, you know God. It's a big difference, between to believe and to know — to experience. And this is the biggest gift to know, to discover, really discover, not to be stuck with your mind and, you know, believe believe.

After we go deep with the Sufi path, it's to know God, to experience God. It's the most important — to open our hearts more and more, until you become paths of love. When you walk in love and you can arrive to some place that you can only serve this way. Serve the love, not yourself. This is a big difference.

Can you discuss why presence is so very valuable right now? At this present moment in history? And at Esalen? 

Ora: You know, if we just wake up in the morning and then we go to work and eat and shit and go to sleep, and then, another day, we just work and eat — we live like animals. We have to stop to contemplate, and we have to go deeper into ourselves to understand our true nature. Not only understanding but polishing our hearts, more and more, to be more complete human beings. And you need help. It's not something that we can do by ourselves. We need the support of a guide. We need the support of the community because the people around us are a reflection of that. If we want to change ourselves — to make minds shift — we have to look inside and be supported by people in the circle. Be guided by someone you trust to take you another step forward ... If you have a very tasty cheesecake, you don't eat it all alone at home; you say, “Come, come! Have some!” We all want to join together and then all elevate together. This is what we do in the workshops. 

Ihab: I think it will be good for us to come to Esalen, to be there, to also experience. Every day, we have something to learn. And I think it's a big gift to be there, Inshallah, because usually the most important thing in your life is to live with people, not to be alone. When you have people that love you, it is — how to say? — our deal is to be loved, always. It’s not [about] money. The most important thing is that we can meet more people — that we can spread this light. And we can invite them to something new.

It's win-win. Usually when you are walking in love, you get love and bring love and light. And this is important to make beloved, we call beloved more and more, to make this circle, to grow up more and more. 

Ora: We have different services. Sometimes, you have to do dishes. Sometimes, you have to be a teacher. Sometimes, you have to be flexible. What is called, what is needed.

Ihab: You know, we realize in our life that He loves us, all of us, because He chose you, chose us, and it's a gift that invites us to be in this light, in this life. And we have to accept this light and to walk with gratitude, with love, with humbleness ... We can see this life with its big gift: its opportunity.

This conversation has been condensed and edited.

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